Reflections on the U.S. Surgeon General’s Report Parenting Under Pressure

Because when even the Surgeon General is saying parenting has become unsustainable, it’s time we stop blaming ourselves—and start looking for a better way.


Did you catch the U.S. Surgeon General’s “Parenting Under Pressure” report?

When I read it, I felt one overwhelming thing: complete validation.
I became a parent coach because I struggled—deeply—with raising my four girls. And I saw so many other parents barely hanging on too. Now, the head of the U.S. Public Health Service is naming what we’ve all been feeling: this is hard, and it’s not just you.

Overwhelmed mother holding her head while children argue nearby—representing parenting stress and sensory overload.

TL;DR

Parenting stress isn’t a personal failure—it’s a public health concern. You’re not alone, and you’re not imagining it. There’s another way forward, one small moment at a time.

Make a Moment

When we feel overwhelmed, it’s easy to think we’re doing something wrong.

The behavior issues. The constant technology battles. The deep fatigue. The guilt.
Parents—everywhere—are feeling this. And unfortunately, guilt and shame often make us spiral harder. We think: If I could just get it right, I’d feel better.

But here’s the thing: the goal isn’t perfection. It’s progress.
That’s the heart of my MicroStep Method®—replacing pressure with presence.
instead of overhauling your entire approach, you shift the moment you’re in. One small, intentional MicroStep at a time.

[Connection Over Correction]
The pressure to “get it right” is relentless. But your kids don’t need perfect. They need connection. And connection doesn’t require more energy—it requires more intention.

Smiling mom and daughter folding laundry—ordinary parenting task reframed as a shared moment of connection.

TL;DR

Instead of chasing parenting perfection, take small, intentional steps toward presence. That’s where real change begins.

Why It Works

Isolation is one of the most overlooked sources of stress in parenting.

Whether you’re a working parent juggling logistics or a stay-at-home caregiver managing meltdowns solo, the lack of real support—the kind we used to get from a village—makes everything heavier.

Stress skyrockets when we feel like we’re doing it alone.
But you weren’t meant to parent without backup.

And just when you finally get a handle on something—bam, a new phase begins. A new attitude. A new challenge. But the solution? It’s not about reinventing the wheel every time. It’s about grounding yourself in moments that work, right where you are.

[The Stage May Shift—The Tools Stay Steady]
Whether you’re dealing with a toddler tantrum or tween defiance, the principle is the same: regulate yourself, then respond intentionally. That’s what MicroSteps do—they build your capacity for calm and connection, no matter the stage.

Young child focused on tying string in nature—symbolizing self-regulation and grounding through small, mindful actions.

TL;DR

You don’t need to master every phase. You just need tools that grow with you—and small moments that anchor you.

Your MicroStep

This week, pick one moment that usually overwhelms you (morning rush, homework drama, bedtime chaos). Choose a single, intentional MicroStep to shift how you respond. Even something as small as pausing to take a breath before speaking can create calm and connection.


Like what you're reading?

Grab my book, The MicroStep Method for the Overwhelmed Parent: Small Moments, Big Impact, for the entire collection of MicroSteps.

Previous
Previous

Connecting Even When You Can't

Next
Next

“Yes, and”—A Surprising Strategy for Your Kids