1 moment. 1 pattern. 1 MicroStep. 1 question.

1 MOMENT

When Mother's Day is all about you. Could that be the hardest part?

Breakfast in bed delivered by four daughters, two, four, six and seven. The pancakes were perfectly imperfect. The homemade cards were all wobbly words and earnest concentration.

The two-year-old had syrup in her hair. The seven-year-old was so proud she looked like she might burst. The other two had smiles that went past their ears.

It was exactly what it was supposed to be.

And I sat there, looking at all of it . . . at them. And I felt something. Something I’m not sure I could name. It just felt off. And I hated myself for it.

Because this was Mother’s Day, and it was supposed to be perfect.

I smiled. I held it together. They didn't know.

1 PATTERN

Mother's Day has a way of bringing up feelings that don't make sense.

Irritation when everyone is trying so hard
Vulnerability when everyone is being so kind . . . to you
A strange flatness for no good reason
Frustration when you're the one making it happen, even on Mother's Day
Something that just sits wrong when everything is right

You're not ungrateful. You're not a bad mother. You're just human. 

Whatever the feeling is.
Feelings aren't facts.
Especially the ones that show up uninvited on good mornings.

1 MICROSTEP

Neuroscientist Jill Bolte Taylor found that an emotion has a 90-second physiological lifespan. Ninety seconds for the chemical response to move through the body and clear. Anything that keeps it going past that isn't the feeling; it's the story we layer on top.

So this Mother's Day when the feeling arrives that doesn't make sense, give it 90 seconds before you do anything else.

Don't explain it. Don't fix it. Don't perform.

Just let it run.

It can sound like this: "This is the feeling. It's not the truth. Ninety seconds."

When you can let the feeling move through, the story has less to work with.

Ninety seconds. Before the story takes over.

So you can enjoy the day.

1 QUESTION

This Mother's Day, when a feeling arrives that doesn't fit the moment, can you give it 90 seconds before it makes you feel lousy?

Just notice.
Because you are enough.  

And all they want is you. 

Mary
Creator, the MicroStep Method®